Let me ask you this – how can we give to others from our cup when our cup is empty? That’s right – we cannot.
So how do we fill up our cups and what does ‘self care’ mean?
An easy way to care for ourselves is with the 4 B’s:
1- Basics - Food, Water, Sleep, Exercise, Breathing
Are well nailing them? No we’re not.
And the difference the basics make when we let even one of them slip? Massive!
Just ask the young Mum with a newborn or the shift worker who’s not getting all the sleep they need about the importance of humble sleep!
Or notice how you feel at the end of a week of skipping lunch and eating snack food instead of nourishing yourself with real food?
Great news though!
The difference the basics make when we choose to refocus and commit to even one of them again is also massive!
Commit to stopping doing other things and start getting the sleep we need and see our lives turn around, not just in those black bags under our eyes, but in the patience we now have for our loved ones or the attention we now have for reading a good book or enjoying a hobby.
Commit to a lunch break, even take it somewhere peaceful and outside and enjoy yummy dark green leaves and roasted pumpkin and toasted nuts and avocado. I don’t know about you but I feel better just picturing that lunch.
Even more fantastic news is - the time, effort and money involved in turning the basics around is small when compared to the results you get.
The only way I know all this is because I have experienced the have and the have not, the erratic and anxious and the calm and balanced from letting the basics slip. So if you are reading this and feeling like you’re in the have not realms with some of your basics – I say to you good!
Now you know what have not feels like, make some changes to those basics and discover what having feels like and then in the future you will find it easy to work out a happy balance between the two ok?
I am BIG on boundaries!
They are road maps for Human relationships and make for good times for both the boundary setter AND the others in the relationship.
I LOVE boundaries because they are a super clear form of communication, that often we only need to set up once and that is all it takes to let The Universe and everyone in it, know exactly what we will and will not put up with.
Setting clear boundaries gives those around us the rulebook on us.
No one can read our minds or our hearts can they? If we want them to know how to treat us, how to speak to us, how to work with us, how to LOVE us, we must teach them right? How else are they to know? So if you like getting what you want, which is every Human I have ever met, then you will want to learn about setting clear boundaries.
3- Be your own best friend
Putting our safety and wellbeing first in big, intense and emergency situations is vital. Though self care also means putting ourselves first in teeny tiny, everyday situations too.
I call this being your own best friend.
So what are these teeny tiny, everyday situations?
For my friend Heidi, it is taking 20mins before her husband and son are up each morning to sit and drink a cup of tea. Sounds like a small thing right? Not much to ask for in life. But it is sacred to her because she makes it a gift to herself everyday. She gives herself this time to simply BE, to relax, not speak, ponder her thoughts or do a little mindfulness practice. Whatever she chooses to do with her time, she is doing it 100% for herself. No strings or commitments or feelings of guilt. It’s all good and it’s all hers and she tells me it perfectly sets her up for the day and even helps her feel calmer generally, including in stressful situations.
So you could take a leaf out of Heidi’s book and allocate yourself some special time to enjoy something especially for you.
4 – Being Human
We are Human. We are doing the best we can with what we’ve got right now. If we could do more, give more, BE more, we would…if we had it to give.
So how about easing up and giving yourself a break ok?
Forgive yourself. We all make mistakes. We are all here learning aren’t we? We give things a go, we make mistakes, we learn from them. It’s ok.
This is being Human.
I know some days your schedule and workloads suggest otherwise, that you’re some sort of machine, but you are Human. So remember everyone is doing the best they can with what they’ve got right now and give yourselves a break. And as soon as you do this for yourself, it becomes so much easier to do for others.
Choosing to believe this makes compassion for others so much easier and not just those people we like or those who have been nice to us. No. Believing everyone is doing the best they can with what they’ve got right now, makes it easy to feel compassion for those who we do not like, for those who weren’t nice to us.
And so there you have it good souls - four easy ways to care for yourself, to fill up your cup, so you can continue doing what you LOVE doing; caring for others. Thank you for caring for others.
Thank you for being Nurses.
Rachel Carroll x
Your Life Changing Coach
Phone: 61 + (0)435 826 096